touching on some really saddening topics today, like depression, antisocial-ness, losing friends, loving someone who doesn't love you back, etc etc. basically what i feel about sad stuffs
i'm going to express my feelings via poetry because i have the feel for it.
and i'm not #illhuemanti just saying i like writing poetry that's all.
depression;
she would smile
and laugh with a smile on her face
everyone believed her
they thought she was happy
she had loving parents
and great friends
and a loving boyfriend
but they were wrong
the people who look the fullest
are the ones who are the most empty
{j.m}
losing a friend;
i see her in the hallway
and a wisp of a smile is on my face
then i remember
what we are
strangers
we were back to strangers
she never glanced my way again
i could not forgot
the laughter of hers
the ways her eyes wrinkled when she smiled
the creases in her forehead when she was angry
the times we spent together
{j.m}
the person who can't seem to fit in
i see her everyday
without so much as a emotion
i wonder if she can feel
if she feels alone
without someone to share her sorrows with
or someone to share her laughter with
was it hard
to be unable to fit in
was it hard
for her to get used to being alone
{j.m}
someone who judges you but doesn't know you personally
i hear their voices
in my head
they don't know anything
but they think they know everything
they don't know anything about me
but all they do is stab knifes at me
their eyes following me everywhere
my life doesn't feel like mine anymore
the whispers when i walk past them
and their stares
the rumours i hear in the bathroom
each one more outrageous than the other
{j.m}
loving someone who'll never like you back
i fell in love with those eyes that crinkled when you smiled
i fell in love with your twinkling laughter
i fell in love with your kind and gentle words that comforted me
but more importantly
i fell in love with you
i felt special with you
i felt as if someone wanted me as much as i wanted them
i felt as if i was on cloud nine
until the day you approached me in class
and you asked if my best friend was available
you confessed with a faint blush on your cheeks that you liked her
and with that my whole world crashed
in front of my eyes
whilst you talked on about how pretty she was
my heart was going through a hurricane
i could feel the tears coming out
and that day i swore it was a mistake to fall for you
because you only treated me as a friend
{j.m}
people that you want to help
you've seen the scars
you've seen that lifeless look
you've seen them drift away mid-way during classes
you know what they're going through
you want to help them
but it's not easy
they aren't even present here anymore
they're in their own world
no one but them
in their special little fantasy
you know it hurts
because you've been through it
{j.m}
worthlessness
everything i do is wrong
everything i do is horrible
everything i do is worthless
because i'm the epitome of worthlessness
i don't deserve anyone
it echos in my head 24/7
and it hurts because it's a mantra
i'm never good enough
there's always someone outthere who's better
better looking
better grades
better personality
better than me
{j.m}
well, i guess that's about it i'm out of poetry juice(lame) and please don't be un-positive like me ((i know the word is negative but oh well)), look at the bright side! i'm trying to too so let's work towards this together :-)
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have a great night ahead and ahoy to chinese new year ����
love, jei
